The Call

2012

I have dreamed for years of a place, or a school or a community for people seeking the magical/connected life.

Life is connected to our mother the earth and our father the sky, the Great Spirit. A place where the individual spirit is recognized as unique, and growth is encouraged through all stages; supported with love.

This dream has carried me to the far reaches of our United States, following visions, intuitive insights and just plain faith.

I once saw in a dream a school with children of all ages, taught by the community of sisters and brothers of the spirit. A community of sorts, a community not cut off from the world, but a community supporting itself and the world around it.

Sometimes there are great large pyramid buildings covered in glass that is actually made of solar panels. Large amounts of land with trees and gardens, and learning is done outside and in gardens. There is healing with methods combining body science, mind and spirit.

Not a commune, a community. Not a cult, no great “one” with all the answers- because we all have the answers within us. A balance between spirit in recognition of no gender or sex or “rules” of evil and threats of pain and sin. Not a place of communist, socialist or tabled political ideologies. A community with healthy boundaries, when the ugly place of growth is recognized as real, authentic and needed.

In 1992 I had a dream that led me to write a poem. This poem has been near and dear to my heart ever since. It, and its sister poem are the cumulative “feel” of the drive and push toward a school, a place of loving learning.

Or, something.... ?

This drive to connect to each other, and to the earth, who awaits our attentions as she lies sick beneath our feet, is immediate.

The first poem is a call to action; it is titled “Journeys”:

Follow me brothers and sisters

Into the light that shines above.

Find it within your searching hearts

To love, and be loved.

The ache that precedes empty hearts

Will not be a part of our journey,

Slough off the shell which holds your souls;

Join me on the path’s to peace.

Look to the man, or woman standing at your side;

They, as well as you, are to be part of this plan

Of peace.

You! You are the one to be a part of this

Pattern; Cannot your dream of

Achieving the universal plan?

This is no game for the lame, and

No place for the weak in spirit.

Journey!

This is the course forward for man

and;

everlasting peace.......

I found that some individuals who read this found themselves in some way, open, to the new. One individual once said, “When it’s time, send this to me, and I’ll know it's time to move.” He never clarified where to move to, but I have come to believe that move within each of us is known; somehow it is part of how we are put together before we arrive in this life.

The second poem I wrote later in 1993, was a poem that embodied not me, but as I dreamed, it was the words for all of my brothers and sisters. The struggle we each face when waking up to the realities of connecting the spirit and making our lives whole, not scattered, shattered images of what others wish us to be; but the struggle beyond the confines of our society and doing the right thing to make ourselves whole beings.

I call it “Beyond Faith”; for you must, as a spiritual being at some point, make the leap, somewhere beyond the confines of your faith to truly awake.

Standing before the chasm of

Illusions; see me no longer, only to

Re-appear in shadows of your dreams.

Kneeling before the altars of

Gods; see only your wishes,

I hide behind the mirrors of your soul.

Lying under the naked

Stars; see nothing but illumined

Visions of where life and truth are revealed

Years have passed and I have written more poetry, but it is these two I revisit often, wondering when the “now” time will come. Maybe “now” is relative to my journey of being a teacher and I will know when the correct student walks the path beside me, or maybe now is always “NOW”.

No longer could I wait, reading this, Q’ero, and Incan tribal leader in 1996:

“Follow your own footsteps

Learn from the rivers

The trees and the rocks.

Honor Your brothers and sisters

Honor your Earth Mother and the Great Spirit

Honor yourself and all of creation.

Look with the eyes of your soul and engage the essential.”

And I cried. I wept for the overwhelming feeling of both relief and anguish that washed over me. The need, the overwhelming need to ACT, and the helplessness and feeling of loss was all consuming. I lay on the floor of my bathroom for an hour feeling so much pain radiating from my solar plexus and sensing the energy of my guides holding me tight; the soothing song of their voices, just beyond my hearing. I knew they were there, holding me during the pain of waking another part of my sleeping consciousness.

The element of connection between our fellow brothers and sisters is the key to moving forward in a time when the boundaries of our physical world make it difficult to connect to the Great Spirit.

Every excuse we can think of prevents us from connecting, such as money, loans, jobs, expectations of the family and the societal norms we have come to expect. These are all things which need to find a balance with spirit.

We, as brothers and sisters in spirit, need to reach out to one-another and connect.

Allowing the societal boundaries to be secondary elements in our drive to do what is right by the Great Spirit, the Mother Earth, and whatever energy you believe holds us together in this world in which we live.

I am hoping that somewhere, somehow the words which have shaken my spirit, and motivated me toward the next step of my journey, will find the person they are meant for, and my sisters and brothers will find their way in this healing path, this path of waking up.

The Veil is thinner now than it has been since the age before, all we have to do is reach out and touch it.

2020

The dark time has arrived.

If feel filled with fear, even though I knew it was coming. I knew before even the most aware entities I have spoken to, were able to validate.

I have talked about the dark time since, well , since I was a young child. As this event has happened, I have heard from many people who have known me for decades. they all ask the same question, "is THIS the dark time?" and now I can confirm. "Yes".

The dark time has been, for me, a dark place difficult to describe, a place of chaos, fear and uncertainty. Death and life, woven together in a consciousness. It is the place where as a species we must grow up emotionally from the self centered child, to the self-aware adult.

The element key to the dark time has always been choice. The choices to connect the spiritual, physical and emotional connections with each other and the world- our world.

Mother earth's consciousness, her sentient awareness is always available to us. The dark time is bubbling up this place of connection, this place of ownership as a collective, to realize our trauma, realize how we have hurt her, take ownership of our actions- as spiritual adults.

We can no longer slide onward, behaving as children living within her ecosystems, hurting, raping, abusing, neglecting, polluting, taking; and generally behaving badly.

As with any child who behaves this way, or even an adult still caught in this place of not being accountable, and blame shaming to avoid their actions- there are consequences.

The dark time of our collective consciousness is a shift, a global FORCED shift event. The "event" is the catalyst for the dark time. The dark time is the years of choices, changes, collective process of changes needed to be made as we as a collective move from the victim blaming, to the adult owning the responsibility of actions needed to fix the problem.

To heal.

Our govermental structures need to change. Our collective care and use of resources need to change. Our cultural barriers need to heal, becoming one people, honoring the rightness and heritage we all bring to the collective. Our separation caused by organized religion needs to be dissolved. Religion is fear.

We have created all this separateness, to keep ourselves in a place of blame- across the globe- a cancer that needs medicine. The medicine is rooted in our ancient cultures, before the ideas of "organized" "square boxed" religious coding.

The medicine of Mother Earth sentient consciousness. She is 1 of 4 sisters. She is the sister of fire, of transformation. The illusion of complete consumption through destruction. And the power of creation through transmutation.

The dark time may "feel" like fear. But look again

That fear can be transmuted into love. So do that!

Guess what happens? Love is peace. Love is light. Love Is.

2022

Yesterday I had something wonderfully affirming happen. I went into a new space, with new people; completely in that place of peace in my heart. That place of light and acceptance, not really knowing what would happen.

I found the flow of energy that led me to connections and affirmations beyond this physical body. I allowed and trusted and used what I know from my connection to Mother Earth and her consciousness to put forth my light and otherness in trust. I got to dance with a sister, laugh and accept the layers of all the unique manifestations of my brothers and sisters in a space. I knew from the moment I connected with one of my sisters, that this place was different.

I did not truly know why this time and space was different, all I knew was to pay attention. The gift of witnessing a Pathfinders passion, to show and push, leads through the tangle of threads known, seen and uncomprehended. I sit in my stillness and true self and accept the gift. It was safe.

There was some confusion; some questions leading to a moment in time that validates decades in what we think of as time.

And for a brief moment, I remember nothing but the sound of my brother’s guides singing, and my own guides touch and I was transported briefly into a glade of purple trees, fresh air, and light. When I came back and looked into my brother's eyes, I knew that he saw me. At that moment I knew I had found another.

Sometimes the veil between the physical self and the true self is “thinner” for some. I have walked my entire life, balancing between the physical world and the true world of light, desperately trying to show my brothers and sisters they are of light and love.

I still don’t know where it leads, but I know I must follow it, no matter where it goes.

For I am a child of the Gods I am a light being and I am not alone, for I have all of you, my brothers and sisters.